Til the End
by Commander X Hyena
Summary: Lord Commander and Jess discuss the past during his last moments. CW: themes of mental health topics, panic attacks, mild violent themes


"It's over. Everything is over."

A truncuate silence fell over the remains of the Lord Commander's ship. The breach was closed, the battle was over, and everything fell silent.

"I lost. I'm going to die."

The Lord Commander fell to his knees, coughing hoarsly, black tar-like blood spattering the ground before him. Staring off into the empty space of galaxy before him, the weight of the situation began to lay heavily on his chest. He wasn't unique, he wasn't chosen. He was left behind to die. All the chaos, all the death and destruction in his wake, it was all for nothing. He'd lost nearly everything. Nearly, he thought, as a heavy footfall to his side reminded him of the one thing that he still had, at the end of it all.

"Lord Commander!!" a comforting female presence cried out, belonging to his long term partner through it all, Jess the Hytrexian. "Oh God, no, no stay with me!" She fell quickly to her knees beside him, scooping him up from the ground and holding him against her chest, wiping away the blood from his face. "I'm so sorry... It can't end like this."

Lord Commander looked weakly up at her. He called for her to hear him out, while he had the chance.

"Thank you. I never took the time to tell you how much I appreciate you," he croaked. "All I ever looked for in my people was loyalty. You... We... we didn't need that." He breathed heavily through his words, his mind straining. "You've always been here. Even before I was.. nah..."

"Do you still remember? Stay with me," Jess encouraged, laying her cheek against his forehead, looking off into space before them. "How much do you remember?"

He placed his hand weakly on her cheek, in a tender display she hadn't seen in him for a long time, while he was so wrapped up in his efforts to stay alive and keep going.

"Everything." He followed her gaze to space outside. "Before I sent that idiot into space, he reminded me of someone close to us. You know who that idiot was, Jess? He was John Goodspeed's son."

They both fell silent for a moment.

"Our John?" Jess inquired, urging Lord Commander to keep consciousness and keep talking.

He gave a weak, solemn nod. "I wanna tell you one of the things I remember about John. He really was my best friend."

_

A typical Tuesday evening, another shift complete and a job well done. Captain John Goodspeed and his small, green round headed alien co-pilot Jack disembarked their ship, stretching and commenting on how long the day had been, and their plans for the evening.

Behind tired eyes, Jack was holding back a lot of anxiety. He'd been sitting on something in the back of his mind for several months now, something he'd needed help with for ages now, the something of which was sauntering up towards them down the exit halls.

"Y'alright, lovelies?" the perky ground assistant and trainee Hytrexian, Jess, exclaimed happily in her brusque English accent. "How was the mission?"

"We got a lot done!" John exclaimed. "Ready for a settled night now, right Jack?"

He twiddled his thumbs quietly, before realising he was being spoken to. "Hm! Oh, dang, yeah it's definitely been a long one, haha... Hey John, actually," he caught his thought process, "are you able to give me a lift tonight?"

Jess interjected quickly, "Sure you don't want me to?" Jack shuffled his feet, looking towards John.

"He's on my route, if that's ok," Jack looked up at John with an expression that could only be described as 'help me out here man!'

"It's alright, I gotcha," John nodded.

"S'all good!" Jess smiled. "With that said, I should dash, rush hour traffic n' that. Take care boys, get home safe!"

Jess gave a polite wave, patted Jack playfully on his waist-height head, and plodded off down the exit hall swinging her car keys in her paw. Jack let out an exasperated sigh, a huge flush across his face from the interaction.

"Thanks bro," he said quietly, leaning against a wall, exasperated. "I'll explain in a bit."

The pair clocked out, leaving their uniforms on to also beat the traffic. Truth was, John wasn't entirely on Jack's route, he just really wanted, no, needed, to talk to his best friend. They hopped into John's car, and began to exit the car park when Jack dropped a suggestion.

"You wanna go get some taquitos man?" he said quickly. "Might be a while, I'm sorry if this is trouble..."

"No, no it's alright." he responded. John could feel the pressure on his friend's voice, and felt like it was important. He'd never seen Jack behave in the way he had the last month, especially not now. "I'll call the wife n' let her know."

They took the quick drive over to their usual spot, a small Mexican establishment a couple miles from work, picked up some food through the drivethrough, and settled in the car park. Jack took a few hasty nervous bites of his food to stall time, before speaking.

"This may sound really stupid, bro, that we came out here on a whim and there's all this set up, it will sound really, really stupid." He took another bite of taquito and continued talking through it, "-U aren' -unna -udge ee, are -u -ro? -orry," he swallowed, "nervous habit."

"Go on then man, spit it out. Not literally, please," John replied with a cheeky smile, "I just had this car cleaned." Jack always felt comfortable around his bro and his confident quips. He sighed, leaning his round head back against the too-tall car seat awkwardly.

"Bro to bro... You're a married man, right John? How do you like... Ugh," Jack gritted his pointed teeth. "Women! How do you...? I, mnn." Jack fiddled with his holo visor absent mindedly as he spoke.

John cocked his head curiously, seeing the same dark green tinge grow on his friend's face, the likes of which he'd never seen before today.

"Ahhh... I see," he replied, the same cocky smile reappearing. "You like someone, don't you?"

"URGH, you have NO IDEA John!" Jack yelled suddenly, nearly dropping his food all over the car. "I've liked this girl for months, man. I can't stop thinking about her, and I have no idea what to even do about it, bro! We're so... different. Yet we're so close, man, I can't even think of a day we've not spent together in the past year, at work or after work, on the phone, even when she went to see her family in England-"

"England? You mean Jess?" John smiled wider. "You fox, I knew it, ha ha!"

"Shut up, this isn't funny!" Jack blushed harder, munching hard at his last taquito. "I -on't -now w-at to -oo."

"Don't ever let her catch you talking with your mouth full, you doofus." John laughed as Jack hastily finished his food with an irritated look. "Bro, you're a catch, I promise. You're what like, just under 30 right?"

"45," he said quietly.

"Dude... You don't look a day over 20," John exclaimed. "We've been working together for 30 years, how are you doing that? And she's in like, her early 20's? A bit odd-"

"Our species lives a lot longer than humans, and Ventrexians," Jack cut him off, knowing the statement he was going for. "In conventional terms, we're the same. Explains the appearence, which thanks by the way," Jack gave a small smile. "I'm aware I'm likely going to outlive her by a good 70 years or so, yeah. I wouldn't see myself with anyone else. She's the best atmosphere I've ever met. She makes work worth coming into." He blushed warmly, before sighing. "I'm aware she's like two feet taller than me though, that I'm her boss at work, that I'm a bit round, and awkward, and quiet and-"

"Hey, stop it." It was John's turn to interject. "I promise you, you're a catch. I thought the same about myself before I asked out my lady," John smiled, gesturing to his phone lock screen quickly, showing a family photo of John with his wife, and his son. "Look at us now. You don't know til you try, bro."

Jack smiled warmly up at his best friend, who gave him a confident grin. "Thanks for coming out here with me tonight bro, seriously. Made a world of difference."

"Make it worth my time," he replied. "Before we leave for that mission next month, to the anomaly. Tell her how you feel." He winked at Jack. "You might regret it if you don't."

"Alright. I'll try," he said with an awkward grin, scrunching up his food wrappers. "Thanks, man."

_

"You wouldn't be here, perhaps, if it weren't for his intervention," the Lord Commander sighed, resting a weary hand on top of Jess'. He gazed once again into the abyss of space out the window. "That was John's son that I threw out there, Jess. It was all for nothing. Every bad thing I ever did was for nothing. I really didn't want to believe that destiny was all just a mistake, I was SO CLOSE..." his eyes furrowed as he let out another crackling choke, spitting more black blood over himself and Jess, who completely disregarded it and hugged him tighter. "I did what I had to to survive. I don't want to die."

"Shh..." Jess comforted him. "I don't blame you. I know what it felt like, I don't know if you remember. Sometimes we do terrible things in pursuit of staying alive. Anything to give us the push to live another day, to give the world some meaning or justification-"

Lord Commander stopped her. "I remember."

_

"John? John," Jack tugged at the captain's arm feverishly. "Where's Jess? Have you seen her today? Did she clock in? Any calls or texts?"

"Whoa, whoa," John looked up from his paperwork. The day had just begun, and already the atmosphere something wasn't right was plaguing over their heads. "What, no I haven't seen her this morning. She wasn't in her office?"

"She's not ok," Jack continued quickly. "She texted some terrible things last night. I've not been able to get hold of her since. I thought she would come into work today and I could help her but I... damn it..." Jack looked terrified, and his forehead wrinkled into a distraught frown. "I'm a useless partner. I don't know what to do."

John gave him a firm, serious look. "Even with her phone off, we can trace her." It was a very sudden shift in pace, as John took to the PC beside him, entering some fast credentials. "I'm not supposed to do this. Everyone's trackable when they work for Infinity Guard. Anyone asks, you didn't know that. Alright?" Jack stayed quiet, leaning against a wall and nodding quickly in response. "Alright, got it. I'm sending co-ordinates to your visor." John quickly pulled out his wallet and stuffed $30 in Jack's shaking hands. "I can't drive you, but I can cover for you. We'll get a temp. Go get a cab. Go!"

With a short, cracked voiced "Thank you," Jack raced down the exit passage, lowering his holo visor as he walked and connecting to the first taxi company he could think of.

The whole drive, Jack attempted failed call after failed call through his visor, and it felt like no time had passed before the cab pulled up by a forest on the outskirts of the city. The driver could go no further towards the co-ordinates, but wished him good luck.

As fast as his small legs could carry him, Jack sped off into the trees, following the placement on the map with his visor, weaving through trees and pushing aside branches, til he stopped at some noise in the distance. He panted heavily, his small round frame unadjusted to the exertion, and strained to hear the direction of the sound over his breathing. Cautiously he moved towards the blip on his map, being able to pin point better the source.

SMASH, SMASH, CRASH. A car alarm wailing, screams and grunts which sounded eerily familiar. He approached slowly, peering round the last tree to witness the source.

An abandoned car that looked, through the damage, unmistakable to the one Jess used to drive before upgrading to her US formatted car. The distinguishable UK license plate hung loosely off the front, the sides dented beyond recognition, every window smashed clean through. Headlights broken, hood bent and roof half collapsed. At the helm, smacking a huge heavy piece of two by four over and over into the busted vehicle, was Jess.

Her hood was up, a scarf covering her face, screaming and yelling at inhumane levels Jack had never witnessed before. Tears streaming down her furious, dejected face. Fur unruly and unkempt. Every beat showed her chipped, scuffed paws, scratched and beat up from the clearly well-worn woodpiece she beat it with. Jack was lost. He had to say something.

"Jess?" he muttered, stepping nervously from behind the tree he was round.

She stopped her strike in mid air, holding the wood above her in silence, whipping her head round to see her partner staring in disbelief. Slowly, she lowered the two by four, and it slid out of her scraped paws. She said nothing. Her knees gave in and she hit the floor, throwing up leaves and dirt around her, and begun to weep. Jack raced up to her and instinctively wrapped her in a warm hug, and felt her uncharacteristically flinch. She didn't meet his gaze, and skidded back on the ground, putting a paw up as though she were being attacked. She looked terrified beyond comprehension.

"Whoa, Jess, whoa. It's me, it's ok." Jack calmly said from a comfortable distance. "I'm not going to hurt you." He understood why this was happening.

His words seemed to snap her loosely back to reality. She hunched over, sniffling, lowering the scarf from her face, trembling. "How did you find me?" she croaked.

"We're not supposed to know this," Jack said quietly, "but Infinity Guard cell phones are trackable. John covered me." He took a careful step forward. "May I come over?"

"Please."

Jack slowly approached her, and sat beside her, his short frame reaching to just about shoulder height, where he rested himself gently. "I was so worried about you."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

They sat in silence for a minute or so, allowing Jess to regain control over her breathing, and her trembles to cease. She pulled herself out of her ball and weakly put her arm around Jack, holding him close. "Thank you for coming."

"Course. I love you, I was so worried you were - y'know." He daren't speak of it. He caught her gaze with his warm yellow eyes. "This old car never stood a chance, eh?"

She gave a small smile. "Hah, guess not. Sorry you had to see that."

"I thought you sold this car, anyway?"

"Couldn't get a buyer, it was too old, not formatted for US roads. Called up DVLA n' told 'em it was wrote off, ended up doing the job myself. It's a bad coping mechanism, I know. Didn't used to be my own car, back home." She looked down shamefully. "Used to be whoever's. I was so mad at why I had to suffer, struggling to find any reason to keep going, it was.. the wrong thing to do, I know. I'd like to think I got better since the transfer, since meeting you, things still build up sometimes though, memories still stick, y'know?" She gave a shallow grunt. "PTSD is one hell of a ride."

"After what you've been through, I don't blame you."

Jess sighed, clenching her teeth. "I was flashbacking at the time you arrived. Sorry I went off like that."

"I understand, it's ok. I tell you," Jack said strongly, holding her tightly, "I ever encounter the dude who did this to you? He would end up like that car."

"Fighting words for a little guy like you," Jess gave a small laugh, leaning her head on top of his as he grumbled in protest. "Thanks babe. I love you."

"I love you too. Please keep your phone on next time, yeah?" He looked up and craned his neck to kiss her on the cheek.

_

Silence fell over the pair, the only sound permeating the air being that of Lord Commander's strained breathing. Jess continued to hold him tight to her chest, nuzzling her cheek against his wrinkled and worn forehead. They'd been through everything together. Committed terrible crimes together, held each other high, fought for one another, and never left each others side.

Lord Commander's withering voice cracked the silence. "I'm sorry that I failed. We were going to rule everything. Be TITANS. I thought that this was destiny. I was lied to, and in turn... I lied to you." He coughed quickly, spilling some more blood.

"I don't care," Jess mumbled, gently wiping it from his face. "Whatever we were doing, we did it together. Always has been us two, having a laugh, bit grim killing some dudes but, it's been fun, right?"

"Yeah." Lord Commander rolled gently onto his side in Jess' lap, wrapping his weak arms around her middle. "You'll stay with me til the end, right?" Jess' eyes began to well as she held him close.

"Til the very end." Jess choked.

"I love you, Lord Commander."

"It's ok. You can call me Jack." Despite his beat up, tired appearence, and his fate before him, he smiled the most genuine smile she'd seen on his face in years. "I love you too."

Jess leaned her head down to his face, and they shared a soft, long kiss, disregarding the sharp taste of blood from the drawback. The pair hugged together in silence, unsure of the near future, but whatever happened, they knew they would be by each others side, til his last breath.


End file.
